In the labyrinth of life, we all yearn for a sense of direction, a guiding star that illuminates our path and fuels our journey. This guiding star is your "why" — your deepest motivation, your core purpose, the driving force that propels you forward even in the face of challenges.

Some people perfer the term "purpose", others "motivation", and some your "why". Personally, I prefer the term your "why" because it gives me a clear understanding as to the main reason or reasons I am doing something.

But what exactly is your "why," and why is it so crucial for creating a fulfilling life?

Understanding Your "Why"

Your "why" is the underlying reason behind everything you do. It's the core belief or value that gives your life meaning and purpose. It's what gets you out of bed in the morning, fuels your passions, and inspires you to overcome obstacles.

As Simon Sinek famously articulated in his book "Start With Why",

"People don't buy what you do; they buy why you do it."

This principle applies not only to business but also to our personal lives. When you connect with your "why," you tap into a deep well of motivation and resilience. You gain clarity on your goals, make decisions with confidence, and persevere even when faced with setbacks.

"Reasons come first, answers come second." - Jim Rohn

I learned this from a couple mentors of mine Jim Rohn and Tony Robbins. They taught me that our "reasons" are actually the most powerful and motivating factors to everything that we do. In fact, they are "why" we do anything that we do.

No matter how small or large something you do is, there is an underlying reason to "why" you are doing it. Reasons or our "why" matter more than what or how we are doing.

So next time you find yourself doing something automatically or even consciously, ask your "why am I doing this?" or "what is the reason I'm doing this?"

The Importance of Your "Why"

• Motivation: Your "why" acts as a powerful internal motivator, driving you to take action and pursue your dreams, even when faced with challenges or obstacles.

  This of it like being stranded in the middle of a rain storm in the middle of the ocean with nothing but a rock to hold onto. That rock is your why, your reason to hold on. If you don't hold onto that rock, you'll certainly lose yourself in the storm.

• Decision-Making: When you're clear on your "why," you can make decisions that align with your values and priorities, leading to a more fulfilling life.

• Resilience: Your "why" provides a sense of purpose and meaning, helping you weather life's storms and bounce back from setbacks.

• Connection: When you share your "why" with others, it fosters a sense of connection and authenticity, attracting like-minded individuals and building meaningful relationships.

Studies have shown that having a clear sense of purpose is linked to numerous benefits, including:

• Improved mental and physical health

• Increased happiness and life satisfaction

• Greater resilience and coping skills

• Enhanced work performance and productivity

Studies have shown that individuals with a strong sense of purpose experience lower levels of anxiety and depression, and are better equipped to cope with stress and adversity. This connection highlights the power of "why" in fostering resilience and providing a sense of meaning and direction in life.

Purpose as a Catalyst for Growth

Having a clear sense of purpose doesn't just give your life direction—it acts as a supercharger for your personal growth! Research has consistently demonstrated that individuals with a strong sense of purpose experience greater personal growth and are more likely to engage in activities that foster long-term development.

When you know your "why," you're more likely to push your boundaries, embrace learning opportunities, and tackle challenges head-on. It will guide you towards experiences that expand your skills, knowledge, and overall fulfillment.

This purpose-driven mindset not only fuels your desire to learn and improve but also strengthens your resilience. When setbacks inevitably arise, your "why" becomes an anchor, reminding you of the bigger picture and motivating you to keep going.

So, if you're feeling stuck or unfulfilled, uncovering your purpose might be the key to unlocking a world of growth and possibility. It's time to embrace your "why" and step into a life of continuous self-improvement and meaningful contribution.

Uncovering Your "Why"

Discovering your "why" is a journey of self-exploration and reflection. It requires you to dig deep, peel back the layers of societal expectations, and connect with your authentic self.

Here's a powerful exercise to help you uncover your "why": The 7 Layers Deep Exercise

The 7 Layers Deep exercise is a powerful tool for uncovering your deepest motivations and values. It's about peeling back the layers of superficial desires to reveal the core "why" that drives your actions and aspirations.

This exercise can be both enlightening and challenging. It requires you to be honest with yourself, confront uncomfortable truths, and dig deep into your emotional landscape. But the rewards are immense.

By uncovering your "why," you'll gain a deeper understanding of yourself, your motivations, and the true purpose that guides your life.

The 7 Layers Deep Exercise

1. Identify a Goal or Desire: Start by identifying a specific goal or desire you have for your life. It could be related to your career, relationships, personal growth, or any other area that is important to you.

2. Ask "Why?": Ask yourself, "Why is this goal important to me?" Write down your answer.

3. Repeat: Take your answer from step 2 and ask "why" again. Continue to ask "why" at least seven times, digging deeper into your motivations with each question.

4. Identify Patterns: Look for recurring themes or values that emerge from your answers. These are clues to your underlying "why."

5. Craft Your "Why" Statement: Based on your reflections, craft a concise and powerful statement that captures your deepest motivation and purpose.

Example:

• Goal: I want to start my own business.

• Why 1: Because I want to be financially independent.

• Why 2: Because I want to have the freedom to create my own schedule and work on projects that I'm passionate about.

• Why 3: Because I want to make a positive impact on the world and leave a legacy.

• Why 4: Because I believe that everyone has the potential to achieve their dreams, and I want to help others unlock their own greatness.

• Why 5: Because I want to live a life that feels meaningful and fulfilling, where I can use my gifts and talents to contribute to something bigger than myself.

• Why 6: Because I always felt like I was never good enough and didn't matter, so I felt unfulfilled and useless.

• Why 7: Because I want to matter.

Notice how the last two "whys" got past the surface level bullshit and became emotionally deep? That's the power of this exercise that my mentor taught me.

So often we believe that the surface level stuff is our actually "why" and what we are after, when it's actually not. No, it's usually much deeper than that.

After doing the 7 layers deep exercise myself, I came to realize that why I want to be successful, a writer, coach, and all the other aspirations I have, is to be seen. Being seen is my deepest, emotional "why" that drives so much of my behavior.

"Isn't that a bad thing though, Eddy?"

No, it's actually not. The reason being is because that "why" not only motivates me, but inspires me to be better every single day. It would be different if it psychologically hurt me and others around me, but it doesn't. I don't showboat or make a fool of myself to achieve this "why." Some people might do that, but that's because they are directing their deepest desire and motivation in an unhealthy way.

Here are some prompts to help you brainstorm your "why":

• What are you most passionate about?

• What activities make you feel most alive and fulfilled?

• What problems or injustices in the world do you want to solve?

• What legacy do you want to leave behind?

• What brings you a sense of joy and meaning?

Navigating Challenges on the Journey

The process of uncovering your "why" can be both exhilarating and challenging. You might encounter resistance, uncomfortable emotions, or even a sense of emptiness as you peel back the layers of your motivations. It's important to be patient with yourself and allow space for these feelings to arise.

Here are some tips for navigating challenges:

• Be Honest with Yourself: Don't be afraid to confront uncomfortable truths or explore painful memories. Authenticity is key to uncovering your true "why."

• Practice Self-Compassion: Be kind and understanding towards yourself throughout the process. Remember that self-discovery is a journey, not a destination.

• Seek Support: If you feel overwhelmed or stuck, reach out to a trusted friend, family member, or therapist/coach for guidance and support.

Living Your "Why": Practical Tips for Integration

Discovering your "why" is a powerful first step, but the true transformation comes when you actively integrate it into your everyday life. Here are some practical tips to help you live your purpose and make it a guiding force in your decisions and actions:

1. Set Goals That Align with Your Why:

• Ensure your goals, both big and small, reflect your deeper motivations and values.

• Ask yourself: "Does this goal contribute to my 'why'? Will achieving it bring me closer to living a more purposeful life?"

• When your goals are aligned with your "why," you'll tap into a natural source of motivation and perseverance, even when faced with challenges.

2. Make Decisions Based on Your Why:

• Before making any significant decision, pause and reflect on your "why."

• Ask yourself: "Does this choice support my purpose? Will it lead me closer to the life I want to create?"

• Using your "why" as a filter for decision-making helps you stay true to your values and prioritize what truly matters.

3. Surround Yourself with Supportive People:

• Cultivate relationships with people who understand and support your "why."

• Seek out mentors, friends, or communities who share your passions and values.

• Their encouragement and belief in you can be a powerful source of motivation and inspiration.

4. Use Your "Why" as a Source of Motivation:

• When faced with challenges or setbacks, remind yourself of your "why."

• Visualize your goals and the impact you want to make.

• Use your "why" as a mantra to keep you focused and motivated, even when things get tough.

5. Reflect and Reassess Regularly:

• Your "why" might evolve and change over time as you grow and learn.

• Regularly revisit your "why" statement and reflect on whether it still resonates with you.

• Make adjustments as needed to ensure your goals and actions remain aligned with your evolving purpose.

Example: Applying Your "Why" to Career Choices

Let's say your "why" is to empower others to achieve their dreams and live a life of purpose and fulfillment. Here's how you can integrate that into your career choices:

• Seek out opportunities that allow you to make a positive impact. Look for jobs or projects that align with your values and give you a sense of purpose.

• Use your skills and talents to help others. Whether it's through mentoring, volunteering, or simply offering a listening ear, find ways to contribute your unique gifts to the world.

• Choose a career path that allows you to grow and learn. Seek out opportunities that challenge you and help you develop new skills and knowledge.

• Create a work environment that supports your well-being. Prioritize work-life balance, set boundaries, and make time for self-care.

If you're a young adult feeling lost, directionless, or limited by your past, uncovering your "why" can be a game-changer. It can help you:

• Break free from the cycle of self-doubt and negativity: When you have a clear purpose, you're less likely to get caught up in comparing yourself to others or dwelling on past mistakes.

• Find direction and motivation: Your "why" provides a sense of direction and clarity, helping you make choices that align with your values and passions.

• Build resilience and overcome challenges: When you know your purpose, you have a powerful source of motivation to persevere through adversity and emerge stronger on the other side.

• Create a more fulfilling life: Living in alignment with your "why" leads to a deeper sense of satisfaction, joy, and meaning.

Conclusion:

Discovering your "why" is a transformative journey that can lead to greater clarity, motivation, and fulfillment in your life. It's about connecting with your deepest values and passions and aligning your actions with your purpose.

By taking the time to explore your "why," you'll gain a deeper understanding of yourself and what truly drives you. This self-awareness will empower you to make choices that lead to a more meaningful and impactful life.

Are you ready to uncover your "why"?

• Take the 7 Layers Deep Exercise: Grab a pen and paper, or open up your journal, and start asking yourself "why." Dive deep into your motivations and see what you discover.

• Share your insights: Once you've uncovered your "why," share it with me via email! Or if you're having problems conducting the exercise, reach out and I'll let you know if I can help. Let's create a community of support and inspiration as we all embark on this journey of self-discovery.

Remember, your "why" is waiting to be discovered. It's time to unleash its power and create a life that truly reflects your authentic self.